Life lately

Last night I went to bed happy and I'm pretty sure I woke up even happier! I have just been my high-spirited self today and it's been so great! I am so excited to finally blog! Though I have a lot of catching up to do.

Saturday February 11 I picked up Sami and Laci and drove to Lafayette. The car ride and filling up my gas tank was full of struggles that they helped me overcome and laughed- about like not ever knowing when to turn. And having to switch lanes. We went to Mcallister's first for lunch. I love both of them and was so so happy that our plans made on a whim actually happened and weren't just an idea!

Then we went to the mall. Not long after we got there Laci's parents picked her up to watch her sister's singing performance. Sami and I were left by ourselves to walk around. For two very indecisive people we did pretty good. But before Laci returned we ended up sitting on the bench and waiting. We got worn out and had been to every store that we shop at. I left the mall with a new dress which I'm very excited to wear, fun teal sunglasses, a necklace, and the last part of Josue's valentine's days stuff.

February 14 was a Tuesday and was Valentine's Day! Though I was exhausted and still not feeling very well after getting home from our Morristown meet the day before at 11:30pm, Josue came over. We exchanged gifts and watched tv. I made him a scrapbook of us and gave him a stuffed animal dog and candy. In addition to the dozen red roses he had sent to school, he gave me a cd he made, a black teddy bear, a picture frame with us, dove chocolate, and perfume from Express. Very sweet.

Friday February 17 we didn't have practice after school- but we had concessions. It was senior night for the cheerleaders, dance team, and boys' basketball and we worked the concession stand during the basketball game. It was long and a few times people had to wait a while for their popcorn. But I'd say we are pretty good.

Then we all drove around a while in the country passing time. Because we were going to see The Vow! We just had a little extra time before it started. It was so sad but so sweet. I love Channing Tatum and his character in the movie. He is just so charming and romantic and can dance and is so handsome.

After the movie we all went back to Sami's for the night. It was so much fun getting to hang out with all the girls on the team outside of just practice.

Waking up the next morning was hard. But we had to be at the school by 7am. We had another invite at Lafayette Jeff. In their tiny gym. And we had to do it without Ally because she got sick. :( Poor girl. We were also all on edge about getting sick after spending the night with her. But for the most part everyone seemed to really step up and improve their scores. I got my best vault score. And also did really well in warm ups. But not so well when I competed bars and floor. But that's alright.

On our way home we stopped at the mall to eat. Then went back to the high school to set up the floor. I just don't know what I'm going to do when gymnastics is over. I'm used to spending atleast half of my weekend with the team! Josue came with to help set the floor up as did Dan. It was nice having extra hands. But its also nice bringing an outsider in to see what all we have to do. Because setting everything up takes a while.

Josue stayed at my house for dinner then we watched the movie Courageous with my mom and Dan. It was so intense and made me really appreciate my family. Family really is so important to me.

Just some thoughts

The last time I blogged, I was getting pretty down on things and running low on my patients. But this are getting back to normal. After a receiving a kind Facebook message from a friend and making spontaneous plans to hang out with a friend last minute on Friday night, things started to turn around.

But before things got better, they got sad. I knew our elderly neighbor who we call grandpa just hadn't been doing well. He has been in ICU at the hospital and really struggling. He passed away Friday morning. Even though we knew his time was coming, my heart broke when my dad told me. It was good that he went to a better place and was no longer suffering on pain, but I was so saddened for his wife. I couldn't imagine losing my husband. I know it really upset her to see him like that in the hospital, and especially to not be able to help him, but I hope and pray that she can remember all of the fond memories over the years of their lives together rather than those painful last images of him. They were the sweetest, kindest people and truly were like a third set of grandparents to us.

Friday night at Sami's house was south fun. Even though we just kinda hung out in her room and watched House Bunny it was good to be able to talk to her and to laugh and to sip on our vanilla cokes from Dari Licious. It was also reassuring seeing all of the happy, laughing friends that her parents had over. I was so thankful to hang out with her.

Then we woke up bright and early for an invitational on Saturday. Waking up early was hard enough. But this was the meet I most dreaded. It was hosted by Lafayette Jeff. In their gym which is at an old elementary school. And tiny. And crammed. And the bars hardly tighten when we put them on our setting. It's awful. There's not enough room for the equipment or judges tables, let alone for the fifteen teams present and even just our parents. With so many teams it took forever even though it moved at a fast pace. We left CHS at 8am and didn't return until 5:30. I went the whole meet only on the cinnamon melt I ate for breakfast from McDonald's , some popcorn Graysen had left over, and some grapes.

Then we worked the concession stand as a team for the basketball game. We were all very tired and sore and ready to go home. But we kept busy with customers and shared stories and did a fine job.

Instead of going right home, I went to josue's house and hung out. We watched Shrek. And we both still laugh at it. But I didn't stay once it was over because I needed to get some sleep.

Sunday morning while the rest of my family went to mass, I hung out at home. I opened up to Josue and told him everything from my week. It was so nice to just get it out. And to smooth over misunderstandings and hurt feelings between him and I the pas week.

I also showered and painted my toenails and fingernails and got all of my laundry washed. It felt so nice to be clean (not that I'm often dirty) and on top of everything. Then I worked on an English paper that was kind of due last Monday.

I took a break for some fun. I picked up Sarah and we went to my dads house to make sugar cookies for valentines day! My dad made and chilled the dough already. So Sarah and I just used the different shaped heart cookie cutters and cut out a ton of cookies.

Then we made frosting (my grandma Demeter's frosting which is the wry best) and decorated the cookies!! The very best part. It was so much fun.And they all looked so good.

Before leaving my dads house, my dad and I went to my neighbors house to give her a card and out condolences. It was so sad. She told us that they were married for 58 years. That is so great. And inspiring and cute.

With plates of decorated cookies, Sarah and I left and went back to my moms house to watch last weeks episode of gossip girl and catch Sarah up.

We got done just in time for me to change clothes, pick up Josue, and make it to church on time. I was happy he came with me and that I didn't have to sit alone.

The Super Bowl started and I was sitting in my room trying to finish up that essay. Ugh. But I think I finally did it.

Then about halftime I went out to the living room. I joined my mom and Dan who had just gotten home from the friends and Josue who came over to watch the end of the game together. I was happy to hang out with him again.

Monday in clinicals I was in the ER. And though again I wish I could write about it, I cant. But I did see first hand just how connected the hospital is. I figured it was very separate and each different unit was isolated. But that is far from the opposite. Many of the different areas (radiology, lab, cardiopulmonary) all must work together and sometimes on the same patients. I thought that is so cool because it is like one big team and everyone must do their part.

Before going to practice, Maria and I went to our neighbor Grandpas viewing . When we got in line and made it to grandma at the front, I wanted to tell her how great of a man her husband was. I wanted to tell her he was no longer suffering and in a better place. I wanted to be strong and supportive for her. But my eyes just filled with tears. But I know it is okay to cry and it is okay to be sad. Especially during a death.

Practice was so great. There were only three of us and it was so chill and laid back. And we went to watch Marka and Kim's nephew(?) wrestle. He is 5. And it was presh. I also got my pop-ons pretty solid and worked on connecting my bar routine and pausing less.

Then after practice Sarah came over and we watched Gossip Girl. And it was good! And we got my mom and sister and all talked on the couch. Mostly about funny injuries that had happened to each of us from our younger days. And she spent the night. Because she didn't have morning swim practice and I didn't have homework. What a great night.

Today is Tuesday. And health careers was good. Because it always is. But because we talked about death within clinicals and how death is a part of life and that we must accept it. It was good for me to hear this with my neighbor's recent death that has been on my mind.

Then fourth period when I'm a student assistant for Mrs. Harms was just what I needed. Not only did she listen to me about all of the ridiculous assignments my english teacher piled on us today, but she helped me with it! She helped me line by line understand a Shakespeare sonnet and a second time so I could take notes. We also talked about divorce and going back and forth and i told her how while she is a teacher, it is obvious that first she is a mom and that she cares about her students and about helping them along.

venting. kind of new for maddymoments. but its much needed.

Lately I have just been struggling. With mostly everything. I have been easily frustrated and lost my patience and been annoyed and aggravated and it was all just building up more and more.

I have been struggling in one of my classes in particular. I do not have any interest in the curriculum and you could say I'm not the biggest fan of the teacher. I just get so fed up with it. The teacher never grades our papers, which I understand especially when you have multiple classes with many papers is a challenging task. I do understand that. But I don't get why we continuously are asked to write more and more essays to just be sat for weeks ungraded:
1) by the time we do get them back many weeks have passed and the paper and its content are irrelevant because we've moved on.
2) I do not learn anything from writing. I already know how to write. And sure it's necessary to practice. But when we finally do get our papers back they are rarely marked with what was wrong and what needed to be changed. Just slapping a letter grade on them does close to nothing for me. Just makes me want to give up because even when I put effort into my papers my letter grades rarely prove it.
It is just a vicious cycle of frustration and anger and stress

And though this is a recent thing or change- the news is so sad. There are often tragic stories of deaths and other crimes. It can be really disturbing turning on the nightly news. Which often reminds me of Jack Johnson's song The News: Why don't the newscasters cry when they read about people who die// at least they could be decent enough to put just a tear in their eye.

Then there are clinicals. As much as I love them, they are hard. And I can't write about anything specifically, but a few times I have witnessed things that just break my heart. I know that the health field is dealing with people, usually sick people, and that things can't always be positive. But it's just so sad to me sometimes.

Not only that. But then I have to go back to school. And just my luck I go directly to the class I described above. At school things are so different. First off, compared to clinicals, school just seems a little tedious and useless. I know it isn't and that learning is important. But it's just a big difference going from real life people and trying to help them to text books. Plus back at school I seem to be surrounded by immature and obnoxious and rude kids. (this clearly includes lying and not telling the whole truth and trying to justify physically fighting another human. Seriously there's enough sadness and suffering and illness due to stuff that isn't inflicted by another person. There is never a reason to try to hurt someone on purpose. The thought of it alone makes me angry). They make fun of people and use awful language and also no one listens to me. I know I speak quietly but literally people never hear me talk. I'm sure most of the time, at least I hope, it is just that they don't hear me. But its so frustrating and upsetting and makes me feel useless. Not to mention when I'm trying to help out or ask for help. And I know it's still high school and kids will be kids and whatever. But I've just had enough of it.

But I know that there is goodness in our world. I don't believe it is perfect, nor do I believe it is like a movie or book. But there is goodness. Father Dennis touched on this in his homily this weekend. He talked about how comic books are (generally) very divided on good and evil and that it is obvious which characters belong to which side. He also noted how in The Bible it talks about love and goodness ten times more than it talks about evil.

I know I just talked down clinicals. But I love love love them. They are the best part of my week. I love being able to see things that we've talked about in class. I love seeing patients get helped. I love all of the staff I've worked with. They are so friendly and professional when they are working with their patients. They also explain everything they are doing and are ultimately just trying to help. Not to mention with me. They take the time to explain everything they are doing to me and answer every single question I ask. I love it. If I had the chance, I would spend my entire day in clinicals. Because it is so much better than school.

Speaking of the health field- I know that I can not do anything that has high risk levels or that has low outcomes of success. It would just be too emotionally demanding for me, because I really feel for other people when they are upset or in pain. Both the patients and their families. I just couldn't do it. But the more I read and talk about it, the more physical therapy appeals to me. It is medical which really interest me and still helping people which I want to be able to do with my career. But, the patients are rarely close to death. Being immobile would be frustrating still, but better than having a fatal illness or being dependent on oxygen and machines. I know that those people need to be taken care of and are just as important as physical therapy patients, and I have the utmost respect for the people that take care of and help those patients. Because I just couldn't. Eventually in clinicals I will go to physical therapy and I can't wait. I am hoping it will be as fitting as it sounds. ALSO! I got into SLU's physical therapy program!! Well pre-physical therapy program which gives direct admission to their physical therapy program. So exciting. Just hopefully I love it when I go to shadow them.

Using SLU as my segue (Bert from OLAB reference) I have been working on applications for scholarships. Which could be good news, I'm hoping eventually. But many of them ask about the future. It has made me think a lot about next year and about how things are going currently and I just have such high expectations for next year. I want to be in a place where people are kind and help each other without hesitation-basically like Camp Tecumseh. I'm hoping so much that college is similar. And I know that part of it is making your experience how you want it to be and getting out of it what you put in. And sometimes (like camp maybe and OLAB maybe, but most definitely not like Costa Rica! I don't know why I was openly myself without any hesitation and free to laugh loud and make friends and speak my mind) I am shy. And I hold back. But I don't want to do that. I want to express my happiness and engage myself fully in everything I do and every new relationship I build. And I know that the ambassadors that give the campus tours are supposed to be pleasant and speak of the school in high spirits- which they did at SLU. But there were many kids on the campus during our tour that were not ambassadors. And were not asked to be happy and make the school look good. Yet they still did. They genuinely looked happy. And like they were enjoying it. That is what I want. Not to mention the dream I had last night about the first week of school with just freshmen at SLU was similar to a Camp Tecumseh setting.

Other highlights and spurts of goodness within my life lately include:

-The show Undercover Boss. It is really uplifting and warming and gives me goosebumps. I love it. The boss of a big corporation goes undercover and works in all of the smaller jobs of the company. Then usually the boss is changed and has a reality check and reveals himself to the people he worked with and often rewards his employees. Definitely worth watching.

-Matt Logelin (The author of Two Kisses for Maddy) emailed me back!!!!! A personal email!!! It made me morning waking up to that!! It was so inspiring that he took the time to do that and made me feel like I was worth so much!

-Lately on the news there is air time about the Super bowl village in Indy. I love listening to the people who are interviewed who are impressed with Indy and with our airport and everything about it. It just makes me feel so good and so proud to be of Indiana.- a place generally thought of as cornfields and hicks.

-Plus the warm weather has not only been enjoyed by the people in state for the superbowl, but by all of us! I love it. I just can't wait until spring break, or spring in general.

-Plus to top everything off that has been a blessing and has kept me hanging on and kept me a little sane: this morning we had a two hour delay! And oh how lovely it was.

Woooohooo!

Today I got a letter in the mail. Though it wasn't cleverly decorated and handwritten like the one I recently received from Sarah Wright, it was very exciting!

I opened the letter from St. Louis University saying I was accepted to their physical therapy program!!!!
I'm still not sure this is exactly what I want to do, but I'm liking it the more and more I talk, think, and research it.

But more about that later. Right now I'm going to continue to dwell in my excitement and dream of the opportunities opening in front of me.

I'm in my happy place

Quite a bit has been happening since I last blogged.

School started up again. This semester I'm in health careers (still love it), english (still dislike it), a student assistant for Mrs. Harms, sociology, econ, and yearbook. I love being a student assistant for one of my very favorite teachers during her prep period. I also love sociology.

Friday January 6 was the first games of the Sugar Creek Classic. After taking a nap after school, I went to Clancy's house to get ready. The theme was retro. Later Brittany, Tayler, Laci, and Mitchel joined us. Crawfordsville beat North! In overtime. It was very exciting.

Saturday January 7 Sarah and I drove to Lafayette. Well I drove. We used my dad's directions for the way there and didn't get lost! Even when twice we had to guess because the directions were unclear. And I got us home all by myself! I felt very accomplished.

We went to Plato's Closet and got quite a bit of money for Maria and I's clothes that we got rid of during Christmas break. We also went to the mall and ate at Panera Bread. I ended up buying two v-necks from lady footlocker and 4 movies from FIY (?) movies place for only $20. One even has Rob Lowe in it.

January 8 was a sad anniversary. In 2008 on that date, my Grandpa Demeter passed away. I remember bits and parts of that day and the week leading up to it as well as after it. It was all so sad and so hard. We all still miss him and love him a lot. He cared about his family so much. He also was a deacon and baptized me, as well as the majority of my cousins. I'm so proud to be able to say that he was pretty much the foundation of my Catholic faith, or the initiater of it. He also really loved ice cream. We always ate dilly bars with him. I was so sad that I didn't eat one, or any ice cream this year on January 8th. I like to in his honor. I did however listen to the playlist of songs that I connect to his death. Thankfully, my mom found me in my room and comforted me. As much as I need other people and their love when I'm upset, I have trouble going and getting it myself.

Monday January 9 Maria went to the animal shelter to walk dogs. I drove her so my mom didn't have to. On the way we picked up Josue and he ended up walking dogs with us. Maria walked one and Josue and I walked one crazy pup together. It was fun when the dog was trying to jump and nip my face. When it starts to get warm in the spring, or when we have another random warm day like that, I want to walk on the trail with Maggie and Josue.

Wednesday January 11 would have been my Grandma Demeter's birthday. It was again a sad anniversary. When I stood with my dad in line with the rest of my aunts and uncles at the vigil service for her, when my dad introduced me to someone they said "oh yes, Madeline. I've heard about you. Your Grandma used to tell me when you were younger you would call her and just say hi! It's me!" I miss her and was sad to not be able to call her on the phone and wish her a happy birthday. But I'm happy that she got to celebrate her birthday with my Grandpa.

Friday January 13 was not unlucky. In fact, it was lovely. We had a two-hour delay!!!! Even better, for me this meant a three hour delay and no hard test to take over the nervous system. This is because my health careers class would go from 9:45-11:13. This wouldn't work because my teacher has to be at work (she is an RN) at 10. So we don't have class on 2 hour delay days. Instead, I was ready to wake up and happy in the later morning. I even got to play with Maggie before school. She had fun ripping up my Christmas loofa.

Saturday we had our first gymnastics meet! It was an invitational at Valpo. It's pretty intimidating there, but nice for our first meet. It was a long drive. 2 or 3 hours. It's so far away there's even a time change. A good thing was that it was close to Dan's parents' so they got to come and watch us! But I curled up and slept the whole way there. The meet went pretty well. I think I got a 5.975 on floor, a 6.4 on vault, and a 4.6 on bars? Something close to that. Maria did really well too I thought. She got a 5.4 or something on beam. Her first time competing ever. It's embarrassing, but my first meet on beam I didn't even get 2. Although, I did compete all around. But yay Maria! Our team came in 6 out of 8 teams. Sami was the only one of us who placed on anything individually.

On our way home we stopped to eat at Olive Garden. It was really yummy. We were all so hungry after spending all day at the meet. The long wait to get a table for all of us was definitely worth it. There were once of laughs once we were happy with food in our stomachs. By the time we got back to Cville it was like 8 or 9pm. And we left the school that morning at 7:15! What a longg day.

Sunday the 15 we went to church in the morning with my dad. Maria, my dad, and I even brought the gifts up to the altar. Father Ziggy was the visiting priest and I just adore him and his energy. We went to the morning mass because I had to work at night. I was a little nervous because it'd been over a month, but it was good getting back to work. I do love the people I work with and all that my job entails. Also-I'm so official now I not only have a bow tie and name tag, but I have the ugly black, comfy sneakers, and a clock in number!

But between church and work, I hung out with Sarah! She spent Saturday night at my house. But we were both worn out. In fact, we fell asleep with my lap top on the bed playing a movie. And in the middle of the night Sarah woke up and moved it to the floor. When we woke up on Sunday she told me that when she did I woke up and said "that was weird." When she asked what was, I replied "I was dreaming we were baking cupcakes and I was like Maria what the heck are you doing?" I didn't really remember this and she concluded she is going to conduct a sleep study on me. Oh dear.

Anyways. After church, she came back over. We played just dance. Then went to Goodwill. We bought silverware and she bought some VHS tapes. Then we came to my dad's for his help. First we measured and cut the silverware.

Then my dad held each one in the blow torch flame. When it turned orange, he used the pliers clamped on each end and bent it to a circular shape. Once they cooled off, we tried them on for size and he adjusted him.

We are so so proud and in love with our homemade silverware rings!!

Monday January 16 was our second gymnastics meet. It was at Southmont against south, north, us, and turkey run's one girl. It didn't seem to go so well for most of the girls there. My floor score improved to maybe 6.1? and my bars to maybe 4.9? I don't know scores are hard to keep straight in my head. However, my vault decreased. South came in first, but we came in second! We beat north. It's always nice beating teams. But it was a long night again. We left the school at 4:30 and didn't get back til 10pm!

Then Gossip Girl was on. And Michael and Lexie joined in watching it. It's hard for me to watch it with people while they talk. But we got through it. I was so excited that the show was back on after the break it took, but it was a little bit of a let down. Maybe one of the worst episodes I've seen. Oh well. I still love it!

Wednesday January 18 was our first day of clinicals!!! At the hospital. We are on our own (though occasionally doubled up) and go to different parts of the hospital and Athens to shadow the people that work in those departments. We even wear scrubs and our name badges! Though I wish I could write all about it and my experiences, I can't due to HIPAA. But I did love it. Admitting was much more involved and interesting than I ever anticipated it to be.

Also. I have submitted two scholarships. And have 3 more in progress. Even though they're kind of annoying to fill out, I feel so accomplished getting them done! Especially not waiting until the last minute. In fact, the two I finished and submitted are due in February! Yay! It feels good to be on top of things for once rather than rushing at the last minute.

Because its a new year and I haven't written anything about 2011 as a whole, or about resulotions or plans or anything for 2012

This is my homework assignment for English. It's for the Letters About Literature contest. Writing a personal letter to an author. Mine ended up partially being a reflection on my year. Kind of.
Also I love the idea of this contest thing. And am going to send my letter to Matt Logelin. Because the contest doesn't. And I think it's important.

Dear Matthew Logelin,

With 2011 coming to an end and 2012 taking off, I have been reflecting on my life throughout the past year. Without any doubt, the two most significant events were starting my blog and the death of my grandma. Both continue to influence my emotions, perspective on life, and the way I spend my time.

Coincidentally, I read Two Kisses for Maddy towards that end of the year and found that similarly to my year, your book was the influenced (and ultimately the result of) your blog and the death of a loved one. I admit I first picked up your book because my name was on the front cover, but as I dove into the pages I found myself connecting to your writing and your story more than I ever could have anticipated. I even found myself applying some of the lessons you learned to my own situation and often shedding tears for both of our losses.

I started my blog the very first day of summer, when most people were happy to get out of school and limit any kind of writing to text messages and Facebook posts. Although I don’t write everyday like I did this summer, I continue to post of my blog. I love being able to write about the people I encounter and how I spend my days. Blogging helps me to reflect on the things I’ve done and become more aware of my surroundings. I try to take in everything so I can remember it, and write about it later. I have found that blogging is, in a sense, the best form of therapy. Reading about how much your blog and the community of readers that reached out and helped you encouraged me to continue to love my own blog and find others to follow. I believe it is vital that people help each other, especially during a time of need. I love that those who helped you, and those you turned around to help, all originated from a blog. It has also been fun to continue to keep up with you and Maddy through your blog.

It was easy for me to latch on to your writing style. As an English student, I understand the importance of correct grammar. But as a fellow blogger, I appreciated the fragments and honesty and humor and strong words that you included in your writing. Though this did not distract any from your story, rather it just enhanced it.

I believe all deaths are different and like you found many times, everyone deals with death differently. One of the ways I dealt with the death of my grandma was through reading Two Kisses for Maddy. Reading your book made me feel less alone. I was able to relate to the feelings and even some of the occurrences you so beautifully wrote about. From the entire book, I clung to this passage most, “The people I encountered in public had no clue what I was going through. It’s not that I expected them to- obviously strangers don’t generally know what’s going on in another stranger’s world- but my entire life had fallen apart, and it felt crazy to see everyone around me continuing on as if nothing at all had happened.” This was exactly how I felt after she died. My grandma was admitted to the hospital for some tests only a week before she unexpectedly passed away on my eighteenth birthday. Like you encountered with Liz’s death, I had no idea anything was wrong with my grandma, especially nothing bad enough to take her life, and I was not prepared for the hardship it brought with it.

I often went to the basement to read Two Kisses for Maddy so no one in my family would see me cry. For a few weeks the pain from the loss of my grandma resurfaced so much while I read your book that I had to take a break from it. Thankfully, I picked it up again and finished it. Reading about your life returning to a normal pace and about you going back to work gave me hope for my own life. I read about how you ultimately overcame her death, but continued to keep her joyful spirit alive and a part of your daughter’s life. This gave me the reassurance I was lacking that even though I couldn’t do anything to change what happened, things would eventually get better. Your book was a vital step to my healing process of my grandma’s death. I also learned the importance of hanging on to what you do have and those you love. I’m not sure how you would have survived the death of Liz without Maddy, just as I could not imagine trying to deal with the death of my grandma without my family.

Sincerely,

Maddy Demeter

The last stretch of break. #bittersweet.

Because it is the last night of break and because I want to finish it off doing something I love. Though I probably don't have time to do each event what it deserves. Also. In the near future I will add pictures, hopefully tomorrow. But today I have encountered (and fingers crossed) fixed more than my share of technology problems.

My mom, Maria, I drove to my cousins' house on Thursday December 29. We played with Gracie, their new golden retriever puppy. She is so soft and fluffy and has the cutest face. She mostly sleeps. A lot. More than I do. And she runs from one toy to the next. She also bites a lot. And has accidents on the carpet. I don't remember that part of Maggie's puppy days. But I am so thankful Maggie is more mature than that. As cute as they are, puppies are way more work and definitely not as smart. Which isn't expected. Mostly I just am thankful for and love my own dog very much.

And it was my cousin Sarah's sweet 16! Yay for her! We celebrated by going to play laser tag. Which was actually pretty fun. We also went out for pizza and had ice cream cake when we got back to their house.

We spent the evening playing their Christmas present from us. It was a game called scribblish and so much fun. You start with a phrase, and they're all very very strange. Then you write it on your paper and draw a picture of it. Then you push it up so the written part is hidden and pass it on so the person next to you can only see your drawing. Then they write a caption for it and push it up so the person they pass to can only see their caption and that person has to draw a picture. You continue this until it makes its round and you end up with your own. We all laughed and laughed a lot from the things that they turned into. It was so much fun. Especially the people who were poor drawers and the other people who made very specific, intense captions.

Friday December 30 we hung out at their house. And watched and played with Gracie. And played Just Dance 3. Of course, Jacqueline dominated us all.

When we got home Josue came over to hang out. We were watching The Notebook, but I mostly just tried to nap.

We had practice that night. There were only a few of us that showed up and we got through everything so we got done 45 minutes early! And I did one of my best vaults all year (apparently I need to run harder) and I got my long hang pull overs again! Yay.

Then I packed for a few days for my dads. house.

Saturday December 31 I woke up early and went to The Lord's Pantry with my dad. Mostly there isn't anything too different from the other times I've written about. Though there was an especially large amount of bread today. And a handful of guys that were really helpful and eager to help out in any way. Also I love that some people are starting to not only recognize me, but even know me by name and things about me. The guy who does assigns people help at holding bags and Ralph, who helps my dad manage the room with the bread and vegetables. We had to leave before it was over, which I felt really bad about. But I had to get home for my next adventure.

At 12:30 I went to Grace's house. Our table at the cheese cake factory had mad plans to hang out again and to try sushi. I was so thrilled it was actually happening! Grace, Olivia, Adrienne, and I drove to Lafayette to Purdue's campus, only to find that the sushi bar place was closed over break! We were let down, but it just encouraged us to hang out again. We ended up eating at Chipotle. It was interesting. Pretty good, but just so much food. We also got to talk a lot, which is always good. About boys mostly. In general and our own specific boys. Also about our plans for New Years and for school next year.

Before heading home we stopped at Von's and Target. Both lovely places. Von's is a bookstore that has expanded and has lots of beads, music, comic books, cards, clothes, and jewelry as well. There was so much that it was a little overwhelming, but it was so much fun to look around at stuff. I ended up purchasing two simple pearl-like beaded rings for Maria and I. I love them!

At 7:30 I headed to the neighbors' house to babysit their son, Noah. It wasn't the most exciting New Years Eve plans, but when they called I had nothing better to do and figured it'd be decent money. The first hour was full of them and their friends watching basketball and running around the house getting ready. Then, Noah and I hung out a while before I put him in his crib. I hated hearing him cry, but it didn't last long. Most of the night I spent on the couch watching tv and sleeping. I also had to get Noah once who had woken up. Finally, at 3:30 the neighbors returned home. I was ready to go home and get in my own bed. Although, I was a little disappointed at the pay I received. Not even earning $4 an hour for the 8 hours I spent my New Years Eve babysitting. Oh well.

Sunday was January 1! 2012! I hung out at my dad's most of the day. I slept in quite a bit and later went to Sarah's house. We watched Friends with Benefits. Though we had to fast forward through parts so I could watch the end before I had to go. I also made a scarf/necklace thing while we watched it. Though I'm not sure how I feel about it.

I rushed home to my dad's house, changed, and went to church. Even though my dad went to mass that morning, he went again so I didn't have to sit alone. I was really thankful. I was signed up to be a Eucharistic Minister, which is why I went to the youth mass in the first place and not the morning mass with my dad. But Father ended up telling me he didn't need me and that I could go sit back down while I was on the altar. Instead, he had to people doing the blood of Christ and he did the body of Christ all by himself. Passing it out I mean. (also its weird referring to it as that. Because usually I just call it the wine and the bread/host. But I guess thinking about it, by the time we receive it, it has became the body and the blood.)

Monday January 2 I hung out at my dad's most of the day, trying to motivate myself to do my homework. Blah. I also went to Fantastic Sam's finally to get my hair cut. I dragged Sarah along, and felt kind of bad because she just sat in the waiting area. I was just so scared to go by myself. I also felt bad when I finished because I didn't tip the girl who cut my hair. But I wasn't sure if I was supposed to. I didn't mean to not tip her :( I do believe that getting your hair cut is so good therapy. 1) getting your hair and head massaged and played with. 2) looking better=feeling better. 3) usually the hairdresser talks to you. Today she only talked about the necessary questions about my hair. I dearly miss Robyn, my hairdresser that moved. Which is why I haven't gotten mine cut in so long.

At 7 I came back to my mom's. I finished homework and (hopefully) fixed my computer and my printer. I unpacked. I watched an Oprah about Steven Tyler. And told stories from my break.

More importantly than being the last day of break, January 2 means Josue and I have been together for four months. He has helped me out through so much and been the reason behind many of the smiles I've had. He is so sweet and truly does care about me, as do I care about him. I think that since we've been together, we have both grown. But I think he's especially grown into more of his full potential and is much more mature.

Maybe I will eventually write like a New Year post. But in case I don't I will post my assignment that I wrote tonight for school tomorrow.